With bated breath..

So tomorrow the Metro will finally be placed under General Community Quarantine (GCQ). While this relaxation of quarantine rules means that further economic activity can proceed, it also comes with a sudden increase in people on the road. Granted that more activity would be welcome in light of all the sacrifices people had to make while adhering to the rules of quarantine, but I can't help but be a little bothered by the fact that Filipinos are notorious for not following the rules, or at least trying to pakiusap their way out of everything. Its just sad that the Filipino mindset like is that of a privileged beggar:

"Kawawa ako kasi tinatamad akong maglakad pa ng onti kaya kailangan pagbigyan mo ako kahit tumawid ako ng wala sa tamang tawiran", or

"Dapat pagbigyan mo ako sa di ko pagsunod sa traffic light kasi nagmomotor ako, kaya nga nakamotor kasi walang pera bumili ng kotse", or even

"Kotse ka at motorsiklo ako, so dapat pagbigyan mo ako dumaan kahit na parang gago ako magmaneho, at kasalana mo kung magkabungguan tayo kahit na maayos ka naman magmaneho, dahil ikaw ang mas malaki ang sasakyan".

These are typical scenarios I encounter every day, even during this quarantine period. Nakakainis lang. Mahirap maawa kung alam mong kinukupal ka lang. Don't get me wrong, people in big cars are sometimes jackasses too. There's just so much jackassery to go around, but those jerks on two wheels are just too much!

Ok, traffic rant over.. A lot of people are making gloomy predictions about the outcome of this GCQ because lets face it, wala ka namang maasahan sa mga tao. Marami ang pasaway na di susunod diyan. These individuals would then probably spread the disease, and would render other people's efforts to properly distance, wash up, stay indoors, moot and immaterial. If we're lucky, these troublemakers would end up as casualties of the disease and we would be better off without them..

We at the frontlines continue to toil away, and we are faced with the potential of a larger wave that would come crashing down on everything we have worked hard for up to this point. Nakakapagod na, but we have no choice except to go on, because if we don't, then who will? So for those people, do what you like, flaunt your gross inability to follow the rules. I'll be waiting to see you on the opposite side of a body bag zipper.

The reintroduction of productivity

There's (hopefully) about a week left of the Modified ECQ  (Enhanced Community Quarantine) that was imposed here at the Metro. I would think that things have "stabilized" a bit. Relaxing the measures has helped a bit, as more people are now able to return to work, and the streets look a lot less lonelier.

Make no mistake, I still, and will always advocate for proper social distancing measures, frequent hand-washing, wearing of masks out in public, and other interventions that have stemmed the tide of this pandemic thus far. I'm not a fan of people going out and being stupid just because, and I feel that those people (who do something stupid without cause) deserve whatever infection they manage to get if they are irresponsible about it.

I'm just so tired of everything. Yes, as a front-liner, I do get to go out daily instead of being cooped up at home, but as what I have said in a previous post elsewhere, being on the front lines does not exempt you from being afraid for your life, or the lives of the people around you who are dear to you.. I have taken measures to make sure I minimize the risk I bring home to my family, even once doing laundry in the middle of the rain just so that my dirty clothes will be properly disinfected before anyone else gets to be exposed to them (I prepare a bleach soak when I get home, and we have an open laundry area). Despite all the disinfection routines I do, I'm still fearful because at the back of my mind, any lapse, any breach, any careless moment, could still hurt my family in ways I do not want to imagine.

Taking stock of the recent numbers that I find here, the numbers have appeared to have stabilized somewhat, and that is in spite of increased testing capabilities, so hopefully the numbers will be more reflective of the actual situation on the ground.

180 new cases in the face of an average daily increase of 200+ is not exactly a total win, but I'll take what I can.. Number of new COVID deaths is in the single digits.. Still not good since people are still dying, but I would say its' a little better than the peak of 50 mortalities last April 13..

Everyone is getting tired of this, especially the people at the hospitals.. I could see it in the faces of the nursing staff, the training fellows, and even the consultants. Despite their smiles, there is a palpable sense of weariness, and a desire to see the end of all this.. Our colleagues at other institutions have already taken strides to reopen their other services in order to serve the greater part of the population who are suffering from ailments other than COVID. These efforts are commendable and are very well thought-out and inspiring. We actually hope to be able to resume other services soon also, to introduce some hint of normality into our institution that has underwent massive changes in order to accommodate the patients with the disease. I just hope there isn't another surge, because even though we are still functional and healthy, a second wave could very easily break the spirits of everyone ...

I mentioned that I was cautiously optimistic, and still I remain so. I guess it helped a lot that I was able to enter a mall again to get stuff other than groceries. It was also refreshing to see other stores and stalls open again, and am hoping for everybody's sake that things will only get better from here on in.

Training has been going great, and we have streamlined certain new procedures as we adjust our way of doing things. These measures are not exactly the most efficient, but I guess getting something done is better than nothing. I just hope I will be able to complete the required census of patients before the training year ends..

Our center has the dubious reputation of being a COVID referral center, and it would be understandable if patients have apprehensions of coming in for consult. as things get better though, we can show everyone that everything is under control, and things could get back to the way they are (for the most part anyway).

Normalization?

By my estimate, its already about 7 weeks into the lockdown, with measures projected to ease up by the 16th.. As always, I should really be doing something more important, yet here I am, blogging away.. Hehe

Being a frontliner, I have the privilege of having a bit more freedom of movement, and I have been at the hospital on a daily basis since my official "start" of fellowship. I consider it to have been a stroke of luck that I chose to toss my hat back into the ring and train yet one more time. At least this move was able to secure me a small but constant source of income as the world eventually recovers from the pandemic.

It has been pretty interesting to say the least. I'm actually enjoying being able to hang around the faculty room with my esteemed mentors, giving mr the opportunity to casually interact with them and pick their brains. The best thing about it is that they consider me as somewhat of an equal now, except where the subspecialty training is concerned of course. I'm a sucker for a good storyline, and I'm loving the way all theses different batches come together, working towards a common goal. Its a lot of fun hanging out at the callroom, telling the newbies stories of how it was before the covid days, and what they would be facing once things eventually settle back to normal, whatever normal will mean in the next few months.

Its really fascinating seeing the composition of the consultant staff, myself included. It seems that our generation has finally bridged the gap in leadership, with the most junior of the senior consultants being around 10-12 batches our senior. I'm honored to be a part of this crew, and hopefully when I complete my training, I get to be a part of it again. Few people are presented with this unique opportunity to be a part of something great, even though I know I will always just be a bit player.

I find myself cautiously optimistic about Covid in the country. I really believe that the lockdown has indeed done its job, and that the numbers (at least in the metro) will soon be going down to manageable levels. I wish I could say the same about the provinces though. Places outside Luzon were a bit late in their lockdown measures, and presently we are seeing numbers peak in the Visayas... A lot of us yearn for a resumption of normalcy at the hospital, so that the training programs can finally start in earnest, and hospital operations can resume to serve patients who have nothing to do with covid. The necessary game-changer would be a rapid CoViD PCR test (*not antibody) that would allow triaging to the appropriate area (covid or noncovid) at the ER level. This would certainly save a lot of headaches and free up rooms filled with patients who are usually awaiting swab results which would then finally enable proper cohorting. It certatinly does not help that there is such a backlog of results at the laboratory, as the testing capacity has been overwhelmed by a deluge of tests (some of them unnecessary and are from certain agencies) that patient management is already compromised at times. Yes, I am bitter, but I'm sure you would too if you find out that the facility's scarce resources are being channeled to other endeavors outside of its' primary mandate..

Readers may have noticed the vitriol I have against the origins of the virus... Those statements were written in the heat of the moment and will not be revisited anymore, although they will not be retracted. I'm still pretty pissed that all this was allowed to happen due to stupid policies and whatnot. I just with they would outgrow their foolish (and selfish) ideology and just function as normal global citizens. I could go on and on about the country in question, but I decided I won't waste any more of my precious time.

Fellowship has been getting interesting. Thanks to the magic of video conferencing, we have been able to hold three lectures already, and has enabled participation of my batchmate who is still locked down in his province since the travel ban is still in place. Luckily, bulk of the initial necessary learning of the subspecialty deals with reading results from a screen. Hopefully s measures ease and the patients return, we would be able to wade deeper into the thick of things with patient interactions and interesting cases.

I'm actually a little confused with my status right now. I am recognized both as a member of the staff, as well as a subspecialty trainee.. I just hope I'm not overstepping any boundaries by hanging out at the "faculty room", but then again, our section head is part of the faculty as well. I guess I will just stay put until we are able to move into our temporary home, since the ward where our section is housed is still being utilized as a CoViD ward.

I really hope that the trend we are currently observing holds true until the end of the pandemic, so that we would be able to resume our state of normality, with adjustments ..