I need to do this..

After barely a month into residency, I need to let off some steam.. Well, maybe I won't vent anything here, but the fact that I'm actually blogging again for a change is already therapeutic in itself.

They weren't kidding when they said that 1st year IM residency in Cardinal was really toxic. The workload is really a killer, and I'm reduced to something like a boarder whenever I come home.. I just go home to sleep and I'm up and away to work again at first light the next day. When you really think about it, our batch has it pretty easy. This year, the training committee decided to get a full complement of eight residents for our batch, which is really great when you consider what happened in previous years.. Now the trick is for us to stay together and support one another to see the year through.. Although I haven't met any of them before pre-residency, (save for Joy, who was an acquaintance from WAAAAAY back) I'm thankful to have batchmates like them who are really helpful and supportive.

Now the trick is to overcome myself, my fears, insecurities, issues, and feelings of inferiority and inadequacy.. I know I still have a very long way to go in terms of self-healing, and I guess that's something you can't really rush. So I guess I'll just have to sail with the tide for a while and hope I don't hit the rocks.. Yeah, I know I seem pretty screwed up right now, and sometimes I can't help but feel that I was just guided by an inflated sense of self-worth which found me trudging along this path... sigh...I'll probably have more on that next time.. I guess that's all for now, I still need to sleep because I'm on duty again tomorrow..... SIGH