Selective Resetting

Il bet everyone wished at one time or another whether it would be possible for life to have a reset button. Different folks would have different needs ranging from an "entire-life reboot" to something as simple as making a different choice somewhere down the road. This entry deals with the latter.

I admit that I have made my fair share of decisions in my life that I wish I never made, but none to the extent that I would want to go back and change something.. Well, that is, until recently..

Being a little bit older and being able to take stock of my life from a more mature viewpoint has its ups and downs. It's good because of the wisdom you gain from certain experiences in your life that you were not able to understand at the time. On the flipside, it is that same increased level of intellectual maturity that may lead you to be disgusted at some of the things you've been through. It's like saying "What the hell was I thinking??".

It is the unfortunate fact that regrets come only after the event has transpired or an error has been made. Even more unfortunate are those regrets that come and hit you much later, years after something which cannot be undone. This seems to hurt more because of the helplessness you feel. With a more proximate event, it would definitely easier (for the most part) to make up for what had happened since if you go by the temporal profile, it's not really too far off. But when the regrets hit you a decade later, BAM! Its like being hit by a ton of bricks. You're suddenly reminded of the decision itself, but moreso of the multitude of possibilities and other pathways you could have taken during the great span of time between now and the past decision. In some cases, your imagination may go into overdrive as you envision totally different scenarios, the other roads not taken, and feel a deep sense of regret from within.. sigh.. 

There are some things I wish I could have changed, but on a positive note, a different kind of change is coming, and may possibly impact my life for the better, permanently.. :)