All of a sudden...

I find that I'm not such a happy camper anymore.

It really puzzles me as to why, because ever since I decided to take the year off on that fateful day, I have been living life according to my own design and thus am supposed to be.. happy.

Here's a recap of the things i have achieved thus far (which I definitely eouldn't had I gone into residency)

- celebrated Christmas AND New Year with the family for the first time in 3 years
- got my Pocket PC fixed at last
- attended Ahia Ed's wedding, Ben and Careen's wedding, and Cedric's reception :P
- bought additional RAM for my ailing laptop
- revamped my wardrobe (a little bit :P)
- went to Pansol for swimming and Intramuros for the Parol Festival with family and family friends
- visited Bahay Tsinoy and the Light and Sound Museum at Intramuros
- dabbled in a bit of outpatient management
- gotten started on cleaning up "my" room which had become a storage area of sorts through the years (still in progress)
- learned how to cook WELL ENOUGH to save my life :P
- cheered for XS as we won yet another championship in the MMTLBA :S
- was able to reconnect with my cousins wh i had kinda lost contact with
- went to HK with the family (a first!)
- was able to watch really cool movies like Star Trek and Watchmen on the big screen

and on a more serious note:
- was able to provide adequate palliative care for my maternal grandmother until she left us to go into the next life...

That's strange.. After having written all of these down, things don't ssem quite as bad as it did a while ago. I guess this is what results from "counting your blessings". :D

Breaking things down, I'm able to identify what might be caused me to be trapped in this funk..
- the feeling of a friend betraying your trust
- "recent events" that lead me to question where I am headed and what I should do
- the really lousy weather (its raining hard intermittently, in the middle of SUMMER!)
- my growing addiction to Facebook, which thus takes its toll on my productivity (this must stop! and it begins now...)
- frustration at my inability to leave the house on a whim (because I'm not really much of a "go out" kinda person)

With all this in mind, I seek to make myself feel better by making some changes in the next couple of weeks.. Hopefully I'll be able to find a reason to smile again by then..